Keeping Track
Beware! They are trying to keep track of you. We are being watched by big business and big government. You can get your free credit report on line at any time. In some areas, they can track you when you use your cell phone. You can install a GPS device on your car that will keep track of it within a few yards. If daddy looks and sees junior is not at the library, then the car will get taken away.
Large grocery store chains are keeping track of our purchases when we use their discount cards. It would not surprise me if one day I was stopped in the produce section of BuyFoodMart and told I was not purchasing and eating enough broccoli. This should not happen because I have taken the precaution of not providing my real name to them, preferring names like Seymour Butz and Rolls Canardly. I also buy broccoli just to throw them off. The customer service person, who gets people to sign up for the card, never seems to pay attention to what name I write. If they ever insist on seeing my Driver’s License, I am in deep manure. I will be ostracized for falsifying my name in order to get a Groger Discount Card.
Our government purchases lists of names from the warranty cards we mail in for battery operated toothbrushes, nail files and navel vacuums. Most of them ask for a date of birth, ostensibly for marketing purposes to see what age groups are purchasing their products. I seldom provide my real date of birth, or income, often making myself much younger, richer and better looking. As a result of this practice, I recently received a notice reminding me I had to register for Selective Service. I wrote back and asked why they wanted to draft someone they had already sent a draft notice to over 30 years ago. They are still mulling that one over six months later.
Citizens revolt! It is a “Garbage In, Garbage Out” world. Provide them with enough inaccurate garbaged data, and there’s no way the world will beat a path to your door, because you live somewhere else. You will get the last laugh even though you are older, poorer and not as good looking as your fake persona.
Large grocery store chains are keeping track of our purchases when we use their discount cards. It would not surprise me if one day I was stopped in the produce section of BuyFoodMart and told I was not purchasing and eating enough broccoli. This should not happen because I have taken the precaution of not providing my real name to them, preferring names like Seymour Butz and Rolls Canardly. I also buy broccoli just to throw them off. The customer service person, who gets people to sign up for the card, never seems to pay attention to what name I write. If they ever insist on seeing my Driver’s License, I am in deep manure. I will be ostracized for falsifying my name in order to get a Groger Discount Card.
Our government purchases lists of names from the warranty cards we mail in for battery operated toothbrushes, nail files and navel vacuums. Most of them ask for a date of birth, ostensibly for marketing purposes to see what age groups are purchasing their products. I seldom provide my real date of birth, or income, often making myself much younger, richer and better looking. As a result of this practice, I recently received a notice reminding me I had to register for Selective Service. I wrote back and asked why they wanted to draft someone they had already sent a draft notice to over 30 years ago. They are still mulling that one over six months later.
Citizens revolt! It is a “Garbage In, Garbage Out” world. Provide them with enough inaccurate garbaged data, and there’s no way the world will beat a path to your door, because you live somewhere else. You will get the last laugh even though you are older, poorer and not as good looking as your fake persona.
posted by The Joker at 12:56 AM
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