Things Not To Do Today

Humor In Doing Nothing.

Eat a snake. Certainly not uncooked.
Staple my foot to an elephant. Perhaps next week.
Hum a few bars of "Flight of the Bumble Bee" while in a pool of jello. Maybe if it were a pool of wine.
Set fire to my underwear. Although singing them would be OK.
Eat a fishsickle (frozen fish on a stick).